Hey everyone! I felt the need to repost one of my first entries…I love you all!
I was a Christian…I think…I grew up in church…my earthly father is in full-time ministry, so that had to solidify it. I was always a “good” person. I didn’t have any dark secrets in my past, or a huge turnaround to spark this earth shattering testimony…what could God possibly use me to do?
This is a dangerous trap that many of us fall into in our everyday life. While we all have problems, most that will be reading this on a computer screen do not have to worry about where they will find clean drinking water today. For crying out loud, the water in our toilets is cleaner than people in many areas could imagine. Problems are all in our perspective. Clarity can come in many different forms, but almost always involves a change of perspective.
I was a person who could have been described as many things, but if I had to nail it down to one descriptive phrase…”worrying control freak” would sum it up. I worried about two health-related issues for a few years. My doctor had mentioned that he almost tested for multiple sclerosis before we diagnosed it as a compression issue in my spinal column. I had also had an eye doctor mention that I was at a higher risk for a detached retina because I was near sighted in one eye. Although the chances of either were minuscule, I let those creep in to the back of my mind at the weirdest times. It was ridiculous, because I was a former college athlete with a Master’s degree in Exercise Science. I ran 5-20 miles at a time…for fun. I knew that these were not anything to worry about. I mean, I didn’t worry about winning the lottery. My chances were about the same.
Fast forward to June of 2014…I went to the doctor because I thought I had gotten whiplash from a rollercoaster that I had ridden at Hershey Park in Pennsylvania. We decided to do a full MRI, and I knew what they were looking for when they added one for the brain. I knew enough about my history to be fairly confident of the outcome. As I expected, one of my biggest worries came to fruition with the outcome…Multiple Sclerosis! As the next week flew by, I had been poked and prodded more than I could have ever imagined. I went in for a routine eye appointment one week later, which was standard protocol before they started my medication. The exam ended with a surprise…”You have the best optic nerves for anyone that I have seen with MS!”…followed by frantic typing…”but we have to get you to the retina specialist immediately…you have a detached retina.” That was the last thing I remember before the sobering sight of a huge needle coming towards my eye.
My worst two fears came true within a two week period, and I was surprised by the thought that came to my mind during that time. All I could think was, “What is there left to be scared of now?” I look forward to sharing with you what I have learned over the last two and a half years, along with how God reveals himself to me everyday. I have had many people ask me why I am so joyful, and I look forward to sharing that with you daily…